Tag Archives: John Lennon

Breaking the Silence

2 Mar

Today I will break the longest silence that I’ve had on my blog. Honestly, I have not fallen off the planet, though it felt like I did for a while.  In the past few months I have made plenty of pies… and I’d like to share some of those photos with you now.

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Putting the finishing touches on a pie.

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Blanca at the tienda gets her Chocolate, Coconut and Banana Cream Pie

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A Coconut Cream Pie for Florina

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Coco and I delivered a Chocolate Cream Pie to Jose and Patty

As you can see, some of those pies were given away in Mexico. Yes, I was lucky to go to Barra de Navidad once again, this time with my kids, Alexandra and Coco. It was so good to see them enjoying the town that I have come to love and find that they are hoping to return. They were comfortable in this small fishing village and were embraced by the same people who have been kind to me.
Michaela, the pharmacist who lives a few doors down from our apartment sat and visited with us many times. She was thrilled to meet my kids and I was happy to see them enjoying her attention.  Then there was Ricardo, our friend who owns a taco stand. When he saw me a few weeks ago, his face brightened and he said, “It’s Karen Amarotico!” We are Facebook friends after all, but I haven’t seen him in a year, and I was touched that he remembered my name. Ricardo and his wife, Nacy, even invited us to their home for a private dinner. The chile rellenos filled with shrimp were delicious and I was so honored to be considered a part of their family!

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And of course, we saw Jose of the Malecon. He’s no longer working in Barra, but rather in the neighboring town of Melaque. Last year, he’d asked me if I could bring him a guitar on my next visit and thanks to my good friend, Tim, I was able to do just that. Jose seemed completely amazed but very happy. It was fun to watch Jose and Coco take turns playing and singing and bridging the language barrier with music.

IMG_1028.JPGMe with Alexandra and Coco
This trip, my kids joined me because my marriage is over. (The details of the dissolution are not important.)  It’s not that I don’t want to be open about the pain and challenges of this phase, but I’m simply learning that my life is not going to be what it was… it will be brand new. And isn’t that what happens?  We think we know what’s coming… but we really don’t.  Yes, John Lennon, life is what happens while we are busy making other plans.  Life also throws curve balls now and then, and sometimes, life sucker punches us in the gut. The pain lessens over time… but it never goes away forever.

Clearly I am not alone in dealing with the pain of loss. It happens to all of us… and if we are open to sharing the pain, then maybe we can show others that while the pain is terrible, it is survivable. If anyone would care to offer the tips, strategies, or words of encouragement that helped them through a time like this, I would love to hear them. Thank you in advance for being willing to share. It means so much to me.

What is most important right now is to say thank you to the many friends and family that have come to my side to help me move forward. You all know who you are, and I am deeply grateful for your support during this difficult time.

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I’d like to end with this quote from Sheryl Sandberg’s Facebook post (following the death of her husband):

“I think when tragedy occurs, it presents a choice. You can give in to the void, the emptiness that fills your heart, your lungs, constricts your ability to think or even breathe. Or you can try to find meaning. These past thirty days, I have spent many of my moments lost in that void. And I know that many future moments will be consumed by the vast emptiness as well.  But when I can, I want to choose life and meaning.”

And as for me, I would like to continue giving away pies.

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Cold Pizza for Breakfast?

21 Oct

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If you just read those words and thought of Christine Lavin, then you know that “Cold Pizza for Breakfast” is the title of one of her songs and also her new audio book!  If you did not realize that… well, I hope I can change that and introduce you to one of my family’s favorite singer/songwriters.

We were first introduced to Christine in the mid-80’s when my friend Lauretta sent me her CD, “Future Fossils“.   This album is a mix of funny songs and deeply moving ones.  A few of my favorites: The Dakota – a beautiful and touching song dedicated to John Lennon, The Bag Ladies Ball (a poem about what she would do if she became a millionaire), and, one of her funniest songs, “Regretting What I Said.”

Our family played that CD so many times on road trips that we knew all of the words to the songs by heart.  In fact, at our annual camping trip, my daughter, Alexandra and I recited “The Bag Ladies Ball” as our contribution to the talent show.  I really admire Christine’s ability to capture feelings that many of us have, and find a way to put them into words and then match them with music that fits them perfectly.

As I was writing this, I remembered yet another of Christine’s songs… it’s called, “The Moment Slipped Away.” I just listened to it again… and it occurs to me that Christine might have planted a seed for my blog many years ago.  In the song she encourages us to share kind words with one another (and not to keep them to ourselves.)  I’ve certainly tried to do that with the people I have shared pies with over these last few years!

Last Saturday night we were delighted to attend Christine’s concert put on by St. Clair Productions.  As always, we enjoyed Christine’s musical talent, her vibrant spirit, and her showmanship (Would you believe she can twirl glow in the dark batons?)  To thank her for being such an integral part of our family (unbeknownst to her!) for all these years, I brought her a Kick Ass Apple Almond Pie.  Thanks Christine… from the bottom of my heart.

UPDATE!  I just received the sweetest thank you note from Christine!  In her email she sent a short video that she made… and unbelievably I am in it!  What a wonderful coincidence!  This is a day I will long remember…  Don’t you just love it when things like that happen?  

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One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain.  Bob Marley

Reading Simple Dreams

 

Christine took this photo of me reading Linda Ronstadt’s book, “Simple Dreams”… after I answered her Trivia Question!

 

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Imagine…

20 Nov

 

Two weeks ago, I attended a Jennifer Knapp concert at Southern Oregon University.  Ms. Knapp is a singer/songwriter who as a young woman made a name for herself in the Christian music scene, and my church (along with a few other churches and the Queer Resource Center) helped bring her to Ashland.  And while her music is riveting, it was not the only reason for her visit.  You see, Jennifer Knapp was adored as a Christian “rock star” until she came out as gay.  Then things changed.   The “Christians” that had loved her music before, now turned their backs on her.  She was no longer considered one of them.

Ms. Knapp shared her spiritual journey with the audience.  She explained how she tried to leave Christianity behind, but felt that the teachings aligned with her core beliefs… and came to the conclusion that even though she was “gay”, she was also a Christian.

After the concert, Jennifer took questions/comments from the audience.  The one that moved me to tears went as follows.  A woman in her forties shared that she had recently come out to her family, and that since that time her son has had nothing to do with her.  She asked what she could do to and Jennifer said, “Love him.  Whenever you see him, love him.  You can’t change him… but you can love him.”

Jennifer sounds like a Christian to me, by golly.   But wait, she’s gay?  So the fact that she is loving, accepting, and forgiving doesn’t count then, right?  Right.

A few days ago I saw on Facebook that it was the one year anniversary of this post, I am Christian, unless you’re gay.  It’s a great article, and if you haven’t read it yet, I encourage you to do so.  The author, Dan Pearce tells us about his friend “Jacob” who is gay… and he goes on to say that his article is not about homosexuality, instead – It’s about love. It’s about kindness. It’s about friendship.  

Jacob had asked Dan to share with his audience (Dan writes the blog, single dad laughing) how it feels to be gay in a conservative Christian community.   Here is a quote from that article, “You don’t know what it’s like to have your own parents hate you and try and cover up your existence. I didn’t choose this. I didn’t want this. And I’m so tired of people hating me for it. I can’t take it anymore. I just can’t.”  

After reading the article, my heart ached for Jacob and the fact that he is virtually being shunned by the community in which he lives for being who he is – the person God made him to be.  My head raced with questions: Who are we to tell another person how to live their life?  What gives us the right to judge them?  What part of that kind of this behavior is “being Christian?”

From all the stories that I have heard about Jesus, I just can’t imagine him turning his back on anyone.  One story that many are familiar with (and one of my favorites) is the about the woman who is to be stoned to death for being an adulterer (according to ancient law).  Jesus does not question the law, but instead says “He who is without sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.”

It seems that we are still acting like those ancient people – wanting to find fault with others (and throw stones) because they are not like us – or they’re not acting like we think they should act.   And when we are focused on others, we remain blissfully blind to our own shortcomings.   But try to imagine what the world might be like if we tried to be more like the man from whom we have the word “Christian”?   I think it’d be pretty amazing… don’t you?

Yesterday I brought a Chocolate Cream Pie to the Queer Resource Center at SOU to thank the people who helped to bring Jennifer Knapp to our area… and to recognize them for all they do to make the university a welcoming place to all students.

You may say that I’m a dreamer, But I’m not the only one.   I hope someday you’ll join us,  And the world will live as one.   John Lennon

 

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Day 268: Sh*t happens

30 Dec

This morning we woke up to a rainy day here in Ashland. I wondered if I would even venture out for a walk with our “grand-dog” but around about 9:30 AM I saw that the rain took a break and I dressed for a potentially wet walk. The walk turned out to be glorious. The sun eventually peeked out and my walk was a lovely meditation on the day.

When I returned home I noticed that the sliding glass door on the back of the house looked strange. On closer examination I determined that it had somehow shattered in the time it took to take my walk. How that happened I still have no clue, but this is what I saw when I returned from my walk.

This changed my day as you might imagine. Now the important thing to do was contact the glass company (Ashland Glass) and hope that the glass would not break all over my deck… and luckily it didn’t. When Chris from Ashland Glass showed up he took one look at the glass and knew that it had to be removed. Darn it! And I still had a pie to deliver!!

About that pie… a few days ago I was driving through town and was about to pass by my friend Tom’s house when I thought of who had owned the house prior to him…. and that was our dear friend Nicholas. I have always been amazed at how Tom and his wife Janet took Nick’s small house and transformed it into the home that it is today. As all those thoughts were careening through my mind I noticed that Tom was standing there by his truck unloading stuff and I knew that I had to stop and say hello.

How interesting that our lives intersected as they did… like threads in a cloth. And if you pulled on one thread, it would lead to other connections. I think that is pretty neat… we really are all connected, whether we want to admit it or not.

Today, Laurel (the filmmaker) came to my house at 3PM and filmed me putting together a Chocolate Cream Pie for Tom. As I had all of the ingredients ready it took less than twenty minutes to do so. However, I had told Tom’s wife, Janet, that we would deliver the pie after 4PM and so Laurel agreed to return at that time.

At about 4:15PM Laurel and I arrived at Tom’s home to deliver the pie and Tom was not there. Janet and Laurel and I talked for a bit and we were about to leave when Janet noticed that Tom’s truck had arrived. That’s when the fun began! Laurel and I snuck out the back door and waited until Tom had entered through the front door. Then we ran to the front door and knocked. When Tom answered the door we were able to present him with his pie… and in due time told him that we’d already been there for 15 minutes prior to his arrival. Sneaky? Perhaps, but his expression when we gave him his pie was priceless.

So, I have to admit that this day did not turn out as I had planned. But who really plans for their glass door to shatter? I think that John Lennon said it best, “Life is what happens while we are busy making other plans.” And so we do the best we can… and for me, that means that my new glass door is on order and my Chocolate Cream Pie is at Tom’s house (hopefully being consumed!) And for now, all is right with the world.

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